Santa-Banta
Bill Gates decided not to invest further in Punjab after receiving a letter from Mr Banta
To: Bill Gates, Microsoft
From: Banta
Date: 1 April 2011
Subject: Problems with my new computer
Dear Mr. Bill Gates,
We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some problems, which I want to bring
to your notice...
1. There is a button 'start' but there is no 'stop' button. We request you to check this.
2. One doubt is whether any 're-scooter' is available in system? I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.
3. There is 'Find' button but it is not working. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot to trace the key with this 'find 'button, but was unable to trace. Please rectify this problem.
4. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when you will provide that?
5. I bought computer, CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which shows 'My Computer': when you will provide the remaining items?
6. It is surprising that windows says 'MY Pictures' but there is not even a single photo of mine. So
when will you keep my photo in that.
7. There is 'MICROSOFT OFFICE' what about 'MICROSOFT HOME' since I use the PC at home only.
8. You provided 'My Recent Documents'. When you will provide 'My Past Documents'?
9. You provide 'My Network Places'. For God sake please do not provide 'My Secret Places'. I do
not want to let my wife know where I go after my office hours.
Last one Mr. Bill Gates
P.S: "Sir, how is it that your name is Gates but you are selling WINDOWS ?"
Regards,
Banta
...............................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Air hostess to all the passenger.?
Kripya apni -apni belt bandh le..
Santa asked"jinhona pajama phena ho vo kya kra?"
.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Santa was driving a jeep in the jungle.
Tourist : If a lion comes close to us, how to escape?
Santa : Simple Sirjee, Give right indicator & turn left.!!
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
After returning back from a foreign trip,
Santa asked his wife, 'Do I look like a foreigner?'
Wife: No! Why?
Santa: In London, a lady asked me `Are you a foreigner?'
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Santa and Banta are two friends and Santa singh has very good job. Banta singh is jobless and one day asks Santa for some good job.
Santa singh says, OK next time we will apply together and they do.
On interview day, Santa singh says, first I will go inside and answer all
questions except last one, and after coming out, I would give you all answers
and questions. So you go and then answer there. You will get the Job. So, Santa
goes in.
EMPLOYER: When we got independence?
SANTA: Efforts started in 1857, but got freedom in 1947.
EMPLOYER: Good. Who is our PM?
SANTA: It changes daily and these days its Manmohan Singh.
EMPLOYER: OK. What's India's population?
SANTA: (He was not to reply last one so he says) Good Question, Research is going on, and when I
know, I will tell you sir.
Now he comes out and tells the questions & answers to Banta Singh.
Banta Singh was real SARDAR and he remembered all the answers but forgot the questions. He goes in Now.
EMPLOYER: When were you born?
BANTA: Efforts started in 1857, but got freedom in 1947.
EMPLOYER: What?? Who is your father?
BANTA: It changes daily and these days its Atal Bihari Vajpayee.
EMPLOYER: Employer is upset now. Are you mad Mr. Banta?
BANTA: Good Question, Research is going on, and when I know, I will tell you sir.
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
One Sardar was enjoying Sun on a Beach in America. A lady came and asked him, " Are you relaxing?".
Sardar answered '" No, I am Banta Singh"
Another Guy Came and asked the same Question.
Sardar answered " No, No, Me Banta Singh"
A third one came and asked the same question Sardar was totally annoyed and decided to shift hisplace.
While walking he saw another Sardar enjoying the Beach. He went and asked him " Are you RelakSing?"
This Sardar was much educated and answered, "Yes. I am relaxing".
The Sardar slapped him on his face and said "Salay, Sab tere Ko wahah doond rahe hai aur
tu Yahaan Aaram Kar raha hai."
..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Once Banta Singh attended an Interview.
Interviewer : Give me the opposite words.
Banta Singh : Ok
Interviewer : Made
Banta Singh : Destroyed
Interviewer : Good... Keep it Up
Banta Singh : Bad.... Put it Down
Interviewer : Maxi Mum
Banta Singh : Mini Dad
Interviewer : Enough! Take your Seat
Banta Singh : Insufficient! Don't take my seat
Interviewer : Idiot! Take your seat
Banta Singh : Clever! Don't take my seat
Interviewer : I say you get out!
Banta Singh : You didn't say I come in
Interviewer : I reject you!
Banta Singh : You appoint me
Banta Singh: Thank you!!
............................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Santa was drawing money from ATM.
Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I've seen ur password. It's ****.
Santa: you are wrong. It's 1394.
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Interviewer : what is skeleton?
Sardar: Sir, skeleton is a person who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!
.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Sardar made a call to the airport.
Asked,"How long is the journey from Punjab to America?"
Receptionist: "One second sir....".
Santa Banta: "Thank you"
To: Bill Gates, Microsoft
From: Banta
Date: 1 April 2011
Subject: Problems with my new computer
Dear Mr. Bill Gates,
We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some problems, which I want to bring
to your notice...
1. There is a button 'start' but there is no 'stop' button. We request you to check this.
2. One doubt is whether any 're-scooter' is available in system? I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.
3. There is 'Find' button but it is not working. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot to trace the key with this 'find 'button, but was unable to trace. Please rectify this problem.
4. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when you will provide that?
5. I bought computer, CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which shows 'My Computer': when you will provide the remaining items?
6. It is surprising that windows says 'MY Pictures' but there is not even a single photo of mine. So
when will you keep my photo in that.
7. There is 'MICROSOFT OFFICE' what about 'MICROSOFT HOME' since I use the PC at home only.
8. You provided 'My Recent Documents'. When you will provide 'My Past Documents'?
9. You provide 'My Network Places'. For God sake please do not provide 'My Secret Places'. I do
not want to let my wife know where I go after my office hours.
Last one Mr. Bill Gates
P.S: "Sir, how is it that your name is Gates but you are selling WINDOWS ?"
Regards,
Banta
...............................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Air hostess to all the passenger.?
Kripya apni -apni belt bandh le..
Santa asked"jinhona pajama phena ho vo kya kra?"
.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Santa was driving a jeep in the jungle.
Tourist : If a lion comes close to us, how to escape?
Santa : Simple Sirjee, Give right indicator & turn left.!!
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
After returning back from a foreign trip,
Santa asked his wife, 'Do I look like a foreigner?'
Wife: No! Why?
Santa: In London, a lady asked me `Are you a foreigner?'
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Santa and Banta are two friends and Santa singh has very good job. Banta singh is jobless and one day asks Santa for some good job.
Santa singh says, OK next time we will apply together and they do.
On interview day, Santa singh says, first I will go inside and answer all
questions except last one, and after coming out, I would give you all answers
and questions. So you go and then answer there. You will get the Job. So, Santa
goes in.
EMPLOYER: When we got independence?
SANTA: Efforts started in 1857, but got freedom in 1947.
EMPLOYER: Good. Who is our PM?
SANTA: It changes daily and these days its Manmohan Singh.
EMPLOYER: OK. What's India's population?
SANTA: (He was not to reply last one so he says) Good Question, Research is going on, and when I
know, I will tell you sir.
Now he comes out and tells the questions & answers to Banta Singh.
Banta Singh was real SARDAR and he remembered all the answers but forgot the questions. He goes in Now.
EMPLOYER: When were you born?
BANTA: Efforts started in 1857, but got freedom in 1947.
EMPLOYER: What?? Who is your father?
BANTA: It changes daily and these days its Atal Bihari Vajpayee.
EMPLOYER: Employer is upset now. Are you mad Mr. Banta?
BANTA: Good Question, Research is going on, and when I know, I will tell you sir.
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
One Sardar was enjoying Sun on a Beach in America. A lady came and asked him, " Are you relaxing?".
Sardar answered '" No, I am Banta Singh"
Another Guy Came and asked the same Question.
Sardar answered " No, No, Me Banta Singh"
A third one came and asked the same question Sardar was totally annoyed and decided to shift hisplace.
While walking he saw another Sardar enjoying the Beach. He went and asked him " Are you RelakSing?"
This Sardar was much educated and answered, "Yes. I am relaxing".
The Sardar slapped him on his face and said "Salay, Sab tere Ko wahah doond rahe hai aur
tu Yahaan Aaram Kar raha hai."
..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Once Banta Singh attended an Interview.
Interviewer : Give me the opposite words.
Banta Singh : Ok
Interviewer : Made
Banta Singh : Destroyed
Interviewer : Good... Keep it Up
Banta Singh : Bad.... Put it Down
Interviewer : Maxi Mum
Banta Singh : Mini Dad
Interviewer : Enough! Take your Seat
Banta Singh : Insufficient! Don't take my seat
Interviewer : Idiot! Take your seat
Banta Singh : Clever! Don't take my seat
Interviewer : I say you get out!
Banta Singh : You didn't say I come in
Interviewer : I reject you!
Banta Singh : You appoint me
Banta Singh: Thank you!!
............................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Santa was drawing money from ATM.
Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I've seen ur password. It's ****.
Santa: you are wrong. It's 1394.
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Interviewer : what is skeleton?
Sardar: Sir, skeleton is a person who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!
.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Sardar made a call to the airport.
Asked,"How long is the journey from Punjab to America?"
Receptionist: "One second sir....".
Santa Banta: "Thank you"